MBT Story Thread(Pending Title)

If your thread needs an OOC thread as well, put it here.

Moderators: VagueDurin, Nichalus

Post Reply
Mandalore_The_Uniter
DX Army Cadet
Posts: 1110
Joined: Sat Jan 03, 2009 10:31 am
Location: Mandelore

MBT Story Thread(Pending Title)

Post by Mandalore_The_Uniter » Sat Jan 24, 2009 3:56 pm

Alright, me and Mirrodin2nd were working on an Idea, we were....
and Something Happened to my Pm thing, i knpow this because i sent a Test PM to Mir, and he didn't Reply, and i know he was on today.....

so i was hopping to Discuss ideas here...

User avatar
Mir
KING OF STRONG STYLE
Posts: 18592
Joined: Fri Feb 10, 2006 5:43 pm

Re: MBT Story Thread(Pending Title)

Post by Mir » Sat Jan 24, 2009 3:59 pm

I saw the PM but I've been a little busy today. I responded though, just before you posted this thread :P
Everyone knows "Pops and Junior = #Ratings"
Everyone knows "Cazzik and Mir = #Wynning"
#Valkob4Life

Your Reigning, Defending EFL Champion
2x EFL Champion (2014, 2017)

Mandalore_The_Uniter
DX Army Cadet
Posts: 1110
Joined: Sat Jan 03, 2009 10:31 am
Location: Mandelore

Re: MBT Story Thread(Pending Title)

Post by Mandalore_The_Uniter » Sat Jan 24, 2009 4:27 pm

sorry......

i got an awelsome Idea For my Main Character, and for this i ask we Switch Our Characters Genders, Make my Mandaloian Character male, and your Character Female, Please?
i Have an Idea for A Custom Armor for Him To Wear, it would Look like the Jungle Combat Gear off of The Force Unleashed,

http://images1.wikia.nocookie.net/starw ... killer.jpg
you cant see very muh of it on this Picture, but its the Only Picture of it i could find....


and the Gender Switch is for an Altered Backstory i might Have, i just need to Do More Research on the Witches of Dathmore.....

Mandalore_The_Uniter
DX Army Cadet
Posts: 1110
Joined: Sat Jan 03, 2009 10:31 am
Location: Mandelore

Re: MBT Story Thread(Pending Title)

Post by Mandalore_The_Uniter » Sun Jan 25, 2009 11:37 am

i found a Picture of the Armor:

its the Jungle Combat Gear in this Video

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_NnkNt0D ... re=related

Mandalore_The_Uniter
DX Army Cadet
Posts: 1110
Joined: Sat Jan 03, 2009 10:31 am
Location: Mandelore

Re: MBT Story Thread(Pending Title)

Post by Mandalore_The_Uniter » Sun Jan 25, 2009 8:56 pm

Sorry about the Multi-Posting, but i fear if i just Update one, people will miss the Updates.....

First, Revised Character Backstory(Warning: Short):

THe Character, Kaleth Narsha, Was born On Dathomir, to a SInging Mountain Clan Witch, and a Mandalorian Bounty Hunter. THe Mandalorian Bounty Hunter and the Witch met, when the Mandalorian Went to the Planet in search of a Singing Mountain Witch who Attacked an Imperial Expedition. When the Mandalorian Came the Front Gate of the Singing Mountain Village, Demanding the Witch, thier was Originally Resistance. After Some Tense Negotiation, The Witch was released to the Bounty Hunter, but only under the Escort of anouther witch, Kaleth's Mother. The Escort was a Mesure to Make sure that the Captice Witch would not Fool the Mandalorian and Escape, althought Kaleth's Father said to his Dieing Day that he didn't Need the Protection. After Delivering the Fugitive Witch to the Proper Authorities, Kaleth's Mother and Father Celebrated at a Local Cantina, after getting Drunk, they found a Room and.....BAM! During the Trip Back, Kaleths Mother Figured out she Was Pregnant with Kaleth, and after Discussing it, it was agreed that the Mandalorian would would take the Child, lest he Suffer the Same Fate all Male Dathomiri did. After 8 1/2 months Kaleth Was Born, with Black Hair and Emerald Eyes. Over the Years, He was Raised as any Mandalorian should be, with the Stipulation that at a Young Age he learned he was Force sensitive, Unfortunately, His Father couldn't Teach him the Ways of the Force, so Kaleth Had to Teach himself. After an Interesting Childhood and Early Teenhood, Kaleth Sealed His 13 Birthday and Entry into Adulthood with the Creation of his Curved hilted Lightsaber, Using a Special Silver Crystal His Father Found. Instead of Learning any of the Standard Styles, Kaleth Created an Improvisational Lighsaber Style, Kalled the Mando'kad. Kaleths Combat Style Revolved Close Combat, to the Point where he could Hold his Own with an a Jedi Knight, if the Force Was not an Issue. Kaleth Joined The Mandalorian Protectors When they Formed, Initially as a Shock Trooper, theyn he Later Became a Supercomando after his Skills in CLose Combat Known after a Squad Dispute, where Kaleth Wipped the Floor with a Mandalorian Nearly Twice his Size. Kaleth Disighned a Unique set of Armor, which Technicly only counted a Brest Plate, and Two Sholder Pieces, it was disighned to be less Knoticable then Standard Mandalorian Armor, and to be Paired with any Set of Under Clothes, So he can adjust the outfit for Different Mission Types, but he stilll had a Standard Armor/Clothing Combo that he wore most of the time.


i got an Idea for a Plot and Bad Guys, but i'll Share it Tomorrow, its 10:57 Pm Where i'm At, and i got Wieght Lifting Class Tomorrow.....

User avatar
Jagtai
The Adminerator
Posts: 9759
Joined: Sun Feb 16, 2003 4:33 am
Location: The Old World
Contact:

Re: MBT Story Thread(Pending Title)

Post by Jagtai » Mon Jan 26, 2009 1:54 am

A few inquiries:

*How did Kaleth manage to build a lightsaber without any tuition? The building of a lightsaber is a milestone on the path to Jedi Knighthood. I doubt an untrained Force User would be able to construct it.

*Mando'kad. How is an unskilled force adept going to be able to construct a new combat form equal to the other, "official" forms, when Jedi Masters are generally unable to do so?

I'm sure someone has a few more inquiries...
"I don't know half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve." - Bilbo Baggins
From madness comes wisdom, and from wisdom comes power.
"I'm convinced you're secretly a British Spy" - Mir

My characters

Mandalore_The_Uniter
DX Army Cadet
Posts: 1110
Joined: Sat Jan 03, 2009 10:31 am
Location: Mandelore

Re: MBT Story Thread(Pending Title)

Post by Mandalore_The_Uniter » Mon Jan 26, 2009 5:15 am

Simple:

1. Kaleth Built A Lightsaber from a Schematic from a Datapad He Found, i should have said this......sorry aout that

2. it's an Improvisational Form, HE MAKES IT UP AS HE GOES!!! and he uses His Body and any other weapons he has with His Lighsaber.


i answered your Questions, i will answer any others

Fun fact for the Day:
Improvisation= The art of Making Stuff up on the Spot

Mandalore_The_Uniter
DX Army Cadet
Posts: 1110
Joined: Sat Jan 03, 2009 10:31 am
Location: Mandelore

Re: MBT Story Thread(Pending Title)

Post by Mandalore_The_Uniter » Mon Jan 26, 2009 8:43 am

Story:
I was origianlly going to Suggest trying to rehashing my Exile: Trail By Fire Debacle, but i got a Better Idea!

How about A Group of People, Mir's' Character as well as mine Included, Escape An Exploding sun With A Colony Ship, and a Group of Frieghters, Cruisers, and Frigates.
They Find themself at a Planet that was once a CIS Strong Hold in the Clone Wars. Further Discoveries Include A Droid Costruction Facility, Initialy Destroyed by Clone FOrces, it would be Rebuilt Easily Enouph, and a Hidden army of B1 Battle Droids, left Deactivated after the Clone Wars, A world under Imperial Control. The planet would be made Capital Of the Renewed CIS. i am still working threw it, but it would e a Solid Story, but we'd have to include the Guy who is the Primary Role-player for the Galactic Empire..


what do you Think Mir?

Mandalore_The_Uniter
DX Army Cadet
Posts: 1110
Joined: Sat Jan 03, 2009 10:31 am
Location: Mandelore

Re: MBT Story Thread(Pending Title)

Post by Mandalore_The_Uniter » Mon Jan 26, 2009 9:38 am

New Version:

Instead of a Imperial World, the Former CIS Stronghold is a New Republic World, and the Planet and systems Surrounding it Seperate from the Republic into a New Confederacy of Independant Systems, this is Because of the Planets Wish to Protect itself and it's precieved Ability to do so after the Refugees found the Droid army, along with The Procurement of A Fleet of Venator 1 Ships.
The Galactic Empire, Seeing the new CIS as a Weakling, Decides to Take advantage and Invades....

still working on it, but i would like your Opinion Mir.....

User avatar
Mir
KING OF STRONG STYLE
Posts: 18592
Joined: Fri Feb 10, 2006 5:43 pm

Re: MBT Story Thread(Pending Title)

Post by Mir » Mon Jan 26, 2009 10:20 am

One still doesn't make sense. Why would he have the schematics to a lightsaber on a random datapad when he's with Mandalorians who not only don't particularly like Force-users and in addition, you said that there were no trained in the Force Mandalorians there because he had to teach himself.

Two doesn't make sense still, because that's basically Niman. In order for him to have gotten that, he would had to have had cursory knowledge of at least two of the other forms. Niman blends the forms together, so it'd have to be at least two otherwise, there'd be nothing to blend together.

The more important point is that no Dathomiri witch would allow the child to stay with the Mandalorian. If she'd stayed with the Mandalorian for 8 1/2 months until she came to the term, odds are she'd just make the Mandalorian marry her, in which case, she's in charge and he would have to go back to Dathomir with her. I also don't find it likely that she'd just up and sleep with a Mandalorian like that, considering how they feel about marriage and how they feel about men, but I'm willing to overlook that due to the presence of alcohol.
Everyone knows "Pops and Junior = #Ratings"
Everyone knows "Cazzik and Mir = #Wynning"
#Valkob4Life

Your Reigning, Defending EFL Champion
2x EFL Champion (2014, 2017)

User avatar
Pryde
Pryngles
Posts: 16795
Joined: Sat May 10, 2003 2:11 am
Location: Earth

Re: MBT Story Thread(Pending Title)

Post by Pryde » Mon Jan 26, 2009 10:48 am

An improvised combat style doesn't necessarily make it equal to other more formal combat styles. About the only advantage you'd get is unpredictability but a master of say, Form II would have an intimate knowledge of feints that could lure you into a trap. Generally, if you're going to mesh combat styles together to create your own it helps to have a working knowledge of what the previous combat styles are and more importantly the weaknesses and strengths of each one.
"Ol' Doc doesn't hide, he hibernates." -- Doc, Star Wars: The Old Republic

"What do you call it when you kill someone and take all their stuff?"
"Adventuring!" -- Tallis and Hawke, Dragon Age 2.

Mandalore_The_Uniter
DX Army Cadet
Posts: 1110
Joined: Sat Jan 03, 2009 10:31 am
Location: Mandelore

Re: MBT Story Thread(Pending Title)

Post by Mandalore_The_Uniter » Mon Jan 26, 2009 12:18 pm

I apreciate these Questions and openly wecome More, it helps me Revise and Flesh out this stuff....

To Pryde: But Kaleth Uses The Knoledge Passed down From Father to son/Daughter for Generations by Mandalorian Families, specificly His Family, and we all know how Good Boba Fett was at Jedi Hunting, and he didn't even have the Force.

to Mir: Kaleth's Father Found the Datapad after Searching For Nearly 10 years for it, he eventually found it in a Jedi Facility, the only One he Found had the Disighn for a Curved Hilted Blade.
Mando'Kad is not based on a Previose Single Style, Because simply Kaleth dosn't Know Any of them, It's purely an Improvisational Form. In The Point about his Mother is a Good One, How about this:
After Kaleth's Parents Discoverd THey were going to have the Child, They went to A Doctor on a Non-Imperial System, and figured out the Child was a Boy. Kaleth's Father, and the Doctor, who both knew what happened to Dathomiri Men, Ganged up on The Witch and Put her into a Electrically Induced Coma, Chemicals would be To Dangerous for the Child. of Course The Electicity was Directed out of her Body before it could harm the child. After Kaleth's Birth, His mother was Brought out of her Coma before being dumped in front of the Singing Mountain Village. hows that?

User avatar
Mir
KING OF STRONG STYLE
Posts: 18592
Joined: Fri Feb 10, 2006 5:43 pm

Re: MBT Story Thread(Pending Title)

Post by Mir » Mon Jan 26, 2009 12:27 pm

I dunno, it still doesn't really work, in my mind. I don't think the Witch would have told the Mando until she was sure of his intentions regarding the child, because at that point she wouldn't have known that it was going to be a man. In addition, the Dathomiri tradition regarding men isn't *that* well known. The Mando would have learned when he went there, but the doctor wouldn't have. I'm assuming that SW Doctor's have to take a version of the Hippocratic oath, and harming a patient because her culture is different than yours would definitely violate any kind of oath like that.

Boba Fett was that good at pwning Jedi because, I dunno, his dad was Jango Fett, probably one of the most famous Mandos in existence, besides Boba. Plus, Jango was around Jedi a lot, particularly Dooku who was on the insanium level when it came to lightsber combat and the Force.

And it can be an improvisational form all you want, but it wouldn't stand against a trained Jedi Knight. Maybe against a padawan or a really sucky Jedi Knight who got lucky to be elevated to the Knight status, but I dunno about a normal Jedi Knight.
Everyone knows "Pops and Junior = #Ratings"
Everyone knows "Cazzik and Mir = #Wynning"
#Valkob4Life

Your Reigning, Defending EFL Champion
2x EFL Champion (2014, 2017)

Mandalore_The_Uniter
DX Army Cadet
Posts: 1110
Joined: Sat Jan 03, 2009 10:31 am
Location: Mandelore

Re: MBT Story Thread(Pending Title)

Post by Mandalore_The_Uniter » Mon Jan 26, 2009 1:02 pm

The Witch told he Mandalorian Because she thought because she wasn't sure of the Gender, and she thought she could fool the Mandalorian into letting her take Kaleth to her Village. and The Mandalorian Told The Doctor of Dathomiri Traditions, and the Doctor, who was Formally a Hutt Slave, decided he wouldn't let a Child he could help suffer the fate he did, oath be D*mned.

and he's not just working with Made up blocks and Strikes, he is working of Centuries, if not Millenia of Mandalorian Fighting Prowess Passed Down his Family, included in Sword and Hand-to-hand fighting, Add to that He's got abilities in the force, and add the Protector Training, and Added Training he Continues to do.....

But i give you the point of Jango Fett thing.....

User avatar
Mir
KING OF STRONG STYLE
Posts: 18592
Joined: Fri Feb 10, 2006 5:43 pm

Re: MBT Story Thread(Pending Title)

Post by Mir » Mon Jan 26, 2009 1:06 pm

Well, from what I understand a Mandalorian facing a Jedi in one on one combat won't win, because the Jedi is just...well...a Jedi.

Jaina went to them, to marry Jedi combat forms and Mandalorian combat forms to create something that was just on the level of craziness.

Cause if the Mandalorians were just that wtfpwning on Jedi, there would be no Jedi who survived Order 66.

You're missing the point about the witch and the doctor. Odds are that she wouldn't even have told the father, since she would have considered the child her property regardless of gender.
Everyone knows "Pops and Junior = #Ratings"
Everyone knows "Cazzik and Mir = #Wynning"
#Valkob4Life

Your Reigning, Defending EFL Champion
2x EFL Champion (2014, 2017)

User avatar
Pryde
Pryngles
Posts: 16795
Joined: Sat May 10, 2003 2:11 am
Location: Earth

Re: MBT Story Thread(Pending Title)

Post by Pryde » Mon Jan 26, 2009 1:13 pm

Boba Fett didn't have an intimate knowledge of lightsaber fighting styles. Boba Fett never had a lightsaber (well, as far as I know). Part of using and constructing a lightsaber is being Force Sensitive (a large part). Lightsabers are weightless so without being able to feel where the blade is at all times it's easy to cut yourself in half with it. To avoid doing that requires training and practice, both in the Force and with a lightsaber and again, you can't improv a combat style equal to current lightsaber fighting styles without first having a working knowledge of each one's strengths and weaknesses.
"Ol' Doc doesn't hide, he hibernates." -- Doc, Star Wars: The Old Republic

"What do you call it when you kill someone and take all their stuff?"
"Adventuring!" -- Tallis and Hawke, Dragon Age 2.

User avatar
Mir
KING OF STRONG STYLE
Posts: 18592
Joined: Fri Feb 10, 2006 5:43 pm

Re: MBT Story Thread(Pending Title)

Post by Mir » Mon Jan 26, 2009 1:16 pm

Actually Pryde, there's a comic where Boba and Vader are fighting, Boba whips out a lightsaber and holds his own against Vader. I don't remember which one though.

Well, it says that its possible its not canon.
Everyone knows "Pops and Junior = #Ratings"
Everyone knows "Cazzik and Mir = #Wynning"
#Valkob4Life

Your Reigning, Defending EFL Champion
2x EFL Champion (2014, 2017)

User avatar
Balsa
Balsa is not a lie!
Posts: 9870
Joined: Sat Nov 06, 2004 2:43 pm
Contact:

Re: MBT Story Thread(Pending Title)

Post by Balsa » Mon Jan 26, 2009 1:20 pm

No, it's canon. The key, though, is that he never constructed one but simply took them from the Jedi he killed (if he did) or, more likely, from the bounties he's hunted, who so happened to also possess a lighstaber.

User avatar
Mir
KING OF STRONG STYLE
Posts: 18592
Joined: Fri Feb 10, 2006 5:43 pm

Re: MBT Story Thread(Pending Title)

Post by Mir » Mon Jan 26, 2009 1:22 pm

I'm not arguing the construction part.

I'm arguing the ability to use it part. He had the ability to fight against Vader. Now, I dunno about you, but I would consider that being damn handy with a lightsaber. Agreed, Mandalore's character is not going to be on the level of Fett, but you can't say that its impossible for his character to be able to do it, just improbable.
Everyone knows "Pops and Junior = #Ratings"
Everyone knows "Cazzik and Mir = #Wynning"
#Valkob4Life

Your Reigning, Defending EFL Champion
2x EFL Champion (2014, 2017)

User avatar
Halomek
Master of the Ninja Post
Posts: 8381
Joined: Sat Feb 15, 2003 9:51 pm
Location: A galaxy far, far, away...

Re: MBT Story Thread(Pending Title)

Post by Halomek » Mon Jan 26, 2009 1:25 pm

Although Fett's lightsaber happened in an official Star Wars publication, it's not considered canon yet. Star Wars Tales (the comic series it was in) are more like What-If stories unless said otherwise by Lucasfilm.

For all interested, this is the issue it happened in: http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Prey
Last edited by Halomek on Mon Jan 26, 2009 1:27 pm, edited 1 time in total.
When life gives you lemons, you clone those lemons and make super lemons!

User avatar
Mir
KING OF STRONG STYLE
Posts: 18592
Joined: Fri Feb 10, 2006 5:43 pm

Re: MBT Story Thread(Pending Title)

Post by Mir » Mon Jan 26, 2009 1:27 pm

Yeah I found it on Boba's wookieepedia page. I couldn't find the issue itself. Thanks, Omek.
Everyone knows "Pops and Junior = #Ratings"
Everyone knows "Cazzik and Mir = #Wynning"
#Valkob4Life

Your Reigning, Defending EFL Champion
2x EFL Champion (2014, 2017)

User avatar
Balsa
Balsa is not a lie!
Posts: 9870
Joined: Sat Nov 06, 2004 2:43 pm
Contact:

Re: MBT Story Thread(Pending Title)

Post by Balsa » Mon Jan 26, 2009 1:28 pm

Yeah, I see what you're saying now.

You're right, it's improbable, but let's be honest, how many of our characters are probable? Maybe one. More likely none. So, I don't see it as an affront if his character is skilled in lightsaber combat without being Force sensitive. Just like anything that is practiced, if a non-Forcer trained with a lightsaber for an appropriate amount of time, he would be able to develop skills in the art, though he probably wouldn't be as skilled as a trained Jedi.

User avatar
Mir
KING OF STRONG STYLE
Posts: 18592
Joined: Fri Feb 10, 2006 5:43 pm

Re: MBT Story Thread(Pending Title)

Post by Mir » Mon Jan 26, 2009 1:30 pm

And that is my point exactly, Balsa.

He's saying that his character can outfight a trained Jedi Knight as long as there is no Force usage. Like you just said, it can be good, but not good enough against a trained Jedi.
Everyone knows "Pops and Junior = #Ratings"
Everyone knows "Cazzik and Mir = #Wynning"
#Valkob4Life

Your Reigning, Defending EFL Champion
2x EFL Champion (2014, 2017)

Mandalore_The_Uniter
DX Army Cadet
Posts: 1110
Joined: Sat Jan 03, 2009 10:31 am
Location: Mandelore

Re: MBT Story Thread(Pending Title)

Post by Mandalore_The_Uniter » Mon Jan 26, 2009 1:31 pm

Mirrodin2nd wrote:Well, from what I understand a Mandalorian facing a Jedi in one on one combat won't win, because the Jedi is just...well...a Jedi.
that's weak, even for me.....
Let me Specify: He was Trained since he was a Toddler for Combat, add to that the fact since not too much Later he Started Training Himself in the Use of the Force, and When he Joined the Protectors, he was trained Further, and has been Furthering his Training since he became a Super-Commando.

he is not a Regular Mandalorian, he has Specialized in Close Combat, and has The Power of the Force at his Side.

and My Backstory for Kaleth stands, it can work, trust me.....


what about the Story idea?


i could use help with that..

User avatar
Balsa
Balsa is not a lie!
Posts: 9870
Joined: Sat Nov 06, 2004 2:43 pm
Contact:

Re: MBT Story Thread(Pending Title)

Post by Balsa » Mon Jan 26, 2009 1:32 pm

Well, if the Jedi isn't using the Force, I'd say the Jedi would lose. Jedi are too reliant on the Force to easily adapt to life without it. It's akin to having a martial artist fight after having his eyes removed. Well, maybe not that extreme, but the Jedi would be at a disadvantage and likely would have lost his mental footing.

Then again, in what normal scenario would you be fighting a Force-less Jedi?

Mandalore_The_Uniter
DX Army Cadet
Posts: 1110
Joined: Sat Jan 03, 2009 10:31 am
Location: Mandelore

Re: MBT Story Thread(Pending Title)

Post by Mandalore_The_Uniter » Mon Jan 26, 2009 1:35 pm

i was using it as a Comparison....

User avatar
Mir
KING OF STRONG STYLE
Posts: 18592
Joined: Fri Feb 10, 2006 5:43 pm

Re: MBT Story Thread(Pending Title)

Post by Mir » Mon Jan 26, 2009 1:36 pm

It'd basically be like Kalja fighting now.

A scenario akin to his would be Akain picking up a lightsaber for the first time. He has extensive prior knowledge of swordfighting and fighting in general, but no way would he be close to taking on a seasoned Jedi Knight.

And no, the backstory for Kaleth doesn't work, I'm sorry. Its just how Dathomiri witches think and behave.

Then the comparison doesn't work.
Everyone knows "Pops and Junior = #Ratings"
Everyone knows "Cazzik and Mir = #Wynning"
#Valkob4Life

Your Reigning, Defending EFL Champion
2x EFL Champion (2014, 2017)

Mandalore_The_Uniter
DX Army Cadet
Posts: 1110
Joined: Sat Jan 03, 2009 10:31 am
Location: Mandelore

Re: MBT Story Thread(Pending Title)

Post by Mandalore_The_Uniter » Mon Jan 26, 2009 1:41 pm

then instead of just telling me what's wrong with it, help me!!!

Xanamiar
Posts: 2343
Joined: Wed May 14, 2003 3:14 pm

Re: MBT Story Thread(Pending Title)

Post by Xanamiar » Mon Jan 26, 2009 1:47 pm

Let me make this really simple for you, Mandalore...

Make a SIMPLE character, one that maybe can become what you want them to become, and start there. Don't start out with everything that you want, just start out with the main character, with a simple background, and light. Otherwise, your story belongs on the Story Board forums, not the Main Board Timeline. Everyone on the MBT has worked to achieve what they have.. Start Simple, and work your way up... or stay off the MBT

User avatar
Mir
KING OF STRONG STYLE
Posts: 18592
Joined: Fri Feb 10, 2006 5:43 pm

Re: MBT Story Thread(Pending Title)

Post by Mir » Mon Jan 26, 2009 1:48 pm

I'm telling you not to do certain things. Thats my way of helping you, by telling you where you're wrong. You need to take that and take what other people are telling you and see what you need to change and what you're willing to change.
Everyone knows "Pops and Junior = #Ratings"
Everyone knows "Cazzik and Mir = #Wynning"
#Valkob4Life

Your Reigning, Defending EFL Champion
2x EFL Champion (2014, 2017)

Mandalore_The_Uniter
DX Army Cadet
Posts: 1110
Joined: Sat Jan 03, 2009 10:31 am
Location: Mandelore

Re: MBT Story Thread(Pending Title)

Post by Mandalore_The_Uniter » Mon Jan 26, 2009 2:03 pm

alright, thank you, both of you.....

how about this: the Father Found out about the Witch's Pregnancy after testing some Blood he Aquired after 'Accidently' Scratching her. And how about when he uses Everythiong: Force Powers, Lightsaber, Blasters, Hand to hand skills, and the Enviroment Around him, he can beat a Low-Mid Level Jedi Knight, but i cannon willingly go farther down then that, His Planned age is 24, and if he can't do that, with all the Advantages he has, he's Pathetic.

but still, what about the story?

User avatar
Mir
KING OF STRONG STYLE
Posts: 18592
Joined: Fri Feb 10, 2006 5:43 pm

Re: MBT Story Thread(Pending Title)

Post by Mir » Mon Jan 26, 2009 2:05 pm

Why would he test the blood? And maybe I'm just not that knowledgeable of medicine, but how would that tell him that she was pregnant?
Everyone knows "Pops and Junior = #Ratings"
Everyone knows "Cazzik and Mir = #Wynning"
#Valkob4Life

Your Reigning, Defending EFL Champion
2x EFL Champion (2014, 2017)

Mandalore_The_Uniter
DX Army Cadet
Posts: 1110
Joined: Sat Jan 03, 2009 10:31 am
Location: Mandelore

Re: MBT Story Thread(Pending Title)

Post by Mandalore_The_Uniter » Mon Jan 26, 2009 2:11 pm

a Pregnancy would mean a Spike in a certain hormone, i forgot which one....

but Kaleth's father would do it because he Knew she had morning Sickness, and Had to be Sure, because he knew what would happen if the Child was male.

but what do you think of the Main Story, an Opinion on that would be nice....

Xanamiar
Posts: 2343
Joined: Wed May 14, 2003 3:14 pm

Re: MBT Story Thread(Pending Title)

Post by Xanamiar » Mon Jan 26, 2009 2:12 pm

Mandalore_The_Uniter wrote:alright, thank you, both of you.....

how about this: the Father Found out about the Witch's Pregnancy after testing some Blood he Aquired after 'Accidently' Scratching her. And how about when he uses Everythiong: Force Powers, Lightsaber, Blasters, Hand to hand skills, and the Enviroment Around him, he can beat a Low-Mid Level Jedi Knight, but i cannon willingly go farther down then that, His Planned age is 24, and if he can't do that, with all the Advantages he has, he's Pathetic.

but still, what about the story?

Story is terrible... I'm just going to be brutely honest here., since you don't seem to understand people being subtle.

START OUT WITH NOTHING.... NOTHING... NOTHING... NOTHING....

That means if he's a 24 year old Force Sensitive who has been wanting to join the Mandalorians, then make him that way.. but he is not to have any Force powers whats so ever, untrained or trained, to start with. Unless you can roleplay his entire training in the Force, he doesn't have it... PERIOD...

Understandable? Yes?

User avatar
Mir
KING OF STRONG STYLE
Posts: 18592
Joined: Fri Feb 10, 2006 5:43 pm

Re: MBT Story Thread(Pending Title)

Post by Mir » Mon Jan 26, 2009 2:14 pm

That part is fine. The story. Since that's creative stuff.

Realisticness of a backstory is something different.

I'm reserving judgement until Balsa comes in and preaches on the medical side of things. I know psychiatry and anesthesiology. That's it.
Everyone knows "Pops and Junior = #Ratings"
Everyone knows "Cazzik and Mir = #Wynning"
#Valkob4Life

Your Reigning, Defending EFL Champion
2x EFL Champion (2014, 2017)

Mandalore_The_Uniter
DX Army Cadet
Posts: 1110
Joined: Sat Jan 03, 2009 10:31 am
Location: Mandelore

Re: MBT Story Thread(Pending Title)

Post by Mandalore_The_Uniter » Mon Jan 26, 2009 2:21 pm

Xanamiar wrote:
Mandalore_The_Uniter wrote:alright, thank you, both of you.....

how about this: the Father Found out about the Witch's Pregnancy after testing some Blood he Aquired after 'Accidently' Scratching her. And how about when he uses Everythiong: Force Powers, Lightsaber, Blasters, Hand to hand skills, and the Enviroment Around him, he can beat a Low-Mid Level Jedi Knight, but i cannon willingly go farther down then that, His Planned age is 24, and if he can't do that, with all the Advantages he has, he's Pathetic.

but still, what about the story?

Story is terrible... I'm just going to be brutely honest here., since you don't seem to understand people being subtle.

START OUT WITH NOTHING.... NOTHING... NOTHING... NOTHING....

That means if he's a 24 year old Force Sensitive who has been wanting to join the Mandalorians, then make him that way.. but he is not to have any Force powers whats so ever, untrained or trained, to start with. Unless you can roleplay his entire training in the Force, he doesn't have it... PERIOD...

Understandable? Yes?

he wouldn't be Kaleth then!

Understandable? Yes?

Xanamiar
Posts: 2343
Joined: Wed May 14, 2003 3:14 pm

Re: MBT Story Thread(Pending Title)

Post by Xanamiar » Mon Jan 26, 2009 2:28 pm

Mandalore_The_Uniter wrote:
Xanamiar wrote:
Mandalore_The_Uniter wrote:alright, thank you, both of you.....

how about this: the Father Found out about the Witch's Pregnancy after testing some Blood he Aquired after 'Accidently' Scratching her. And how about when he uses Everythiong: Force Powers, Lightsaber, Blasters, Hand to hand skills, and the Enviroment Around him, he can beat a Low-Mid Level Jedi Knight, but i cannon willingly go farther down then that, His Planned age is 24, and if he can't do that, with all the Advantages he has, he's Pathetic.

but still, what about the story?

Story is terrible... I'm just going to be brutely honest here., since you don't seem to understand people being subtle.

START OUT WITH NOTHING.... NOTHING... NOTHING... NOTHING....

That means if he's a 24 year old Force Sensitive who has been wanting to join the Mandalorians, then make him that way.. but he is not to have any Force powers whats so ever, untrained or trained, to start with. Unless you can roleplay his entire training in the Force, he doesn't have it... PERIOD...

Understandable? Yes?

he wouldn't be Kaleth then!

Understandable? Yes?
Is there anywhere in my post that says anything about him being Kaleth? No I didn't... And I requote myself ...

"START OUT WITH NOTHING.... NOTHING... NOTHING... NOTHING..."

can you understand that? ..it means basically you are lvl 1 Jedi, that needs to make his way through the ranks, you can't beat a lvl 2 Jedi at this point. You definately can't beat a mid level Jedi... You might be able to beat the little robot droid, if you roleplay it out well enough, but you should start with NOTHING... Find some humility, and use it. Make a character that doesn't challenge every single other character on the board, make a character that someone will want to train, not a character that everyone and their children are going to want to kill.

START WITH NOTHING

how much more simple can I make that?

User avatar
Balsa
Balsa is not a lie!
Posts: 9870
Joined: Sat Nov 06, 2004 2:43 pm
Contact:

Re: MBT Story Thread(Pending Title)

Post by Balsa » Mon Jan 26, 2009 2:43 pm

Mandalore is correct in that there will be the presence of certain hormones in the blood. During the first few weeks, hCG (human chorionic gonadotropin) will be present in blood and urine. Then you've got estrogen, progestin, and oxytocin. Spelling mistakes mine. lol

Mandalore_The_Uniter
DX Army Cadet
Posts: 1110
Joined: Sat Jan 03, 2009 10:31 am
Location: Mandelore

Re: MBT Story Thread(Pending Title)

Post by Mandalore_The_Uniter » Mon Jan 26, 2009 2:44 pm

Your Saying i have to start from square One, but Kaleth is Kaleth because of what he is not LVL 1. Unless Mir, my Partner in this Story, says anything to back you up, Step Off.....while my Temper remains in check.

User avatar
Balsa
Balsa is not a lie!
Posts: 9870
Joined: Sat Nov 06, 2004 2:43 pm
Contact:

Re: MBT Story Thread(Pending Title)

Post by Balsa » Mon Jan 26, 2009 2:49 pm

I won't agree with Xanamiar here, nor will I completely disagree. While I see his point, I do believe that one does not have to start from square one. If that were the case, then 99% of all the characters we have would be set back some 5 RL years. However, I won't advocate starting a character at "Darth Vader"-level because that does sound a bit like GMing. What you can do, and what many of us have done, is write a good back story for your character, something in the lines of tens of pages, to show that you've given thought into the history and development of your character. That story can be posted on the Story Forums. While you're doing this, go ahead and RP whatever you want since getting bogged down in this process isn't the goal of this place.

Post Reply